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Moving from Victim to Victor

Our lives are made up of events. How we experience these events is based upon our perception of what happened. The perception we are experiencing is formed by the thoughts we tell ourselves about what happened. Thoughts are mental energy and are capable of influencing our day in a "good" or "bad" way. Depending on which words we choose to describe the event that happened, life may flow easily or be a struggle. Our reaction may appear in one or all of the three ways: physiologically, emotionally and/or behaviorally.

All of us desire to have more control over that small, yet powerful, little voice in our heads, but we sometimes forget that we are the ones creating the thoughts that place us in the victim role. We may make the mistake of thinking that what happened is what caused our reaction; that A (the event) caused C (the reaction) instead of including B (our thoughts) into the equation. This exercise will allow you to move from victim to victor over your little voice, by having you notice just what it is you are saying to yourself about what happened. The equation actually goes like this: A (the event) + B (our thoughts) = C (the reaction).

To begin experiencing your life with a renewed outlook for happiness, take on this exercise for the next few days. Get a journal or notebook and begin making three columns with the headings:

A (the event)
B (my thoughts)
C (my reaction)

In your journal, begin making as many entries as possible on the events in your life where you identify them in the three parts of the model. Next, start changing the thoughts in section B with a more positive slant and see what you notice with your response in all three areas: physiologically, emotionally and behaviorally.

As a result of doing this exercise you will begin taking back your power, by getting out of blame and being more responsibile for your reactions to events in your life. Thus, you are moving from victim to victor and reaping the benefits of more control and happiness. Good Luck!

Christel


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